@tsand I'll skip the bacon pound cake, but looks like cheesy potatoes with sour cream and chives for lunch =) #
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I actually went through Target and didn’t buy anything excessive. Put away a bunch of things I knew I didn’t need — a couple shirts, some curtains, sheets, containers.
But did stock up on a few household items on sale - mop head, kitty litter, laundry detergent, hand soap. However, I completely forgot cat food, which was what I went there for =)
Birthday with Mom was good. Dessert came out too….
Also took pictures of the yard….
I’m attempting to make Barefoot Contessa’s Mixed Berry Pavlova for my mother’s birthday “cake.” She turns 67 today. And is on weight watchers so I loaded up a ton of fruit and cut back on the sugar — indulgence at 200 calories each if we slice it in 6 portions.
I’m going to take strawberries and make them into candle holders — slice off the top for a flat edge and stick each candle in the end. Not sure how many candles yet. 8 sounds about right. Not sure. And I forgot something to have “Happy Birthday” on top. Meant to look at the store to see if they had some kind of topper. Oh well. Candles are good. And I got cool ones — rainbow colors and the flame is supposed to match the color of the candle (blue candle has blue flame, green candle has green flame, etc.)
The folks are picking me up in 45 minutes to go walking around Rhinebeck (2 towns north.) We were originally going to go to the city, but dad thought otherwise. I knew he didn’t want to walk over the Brooklyn Bridge — something my mother has always wanted to do — so I told her I’d go down to the city with her when weather was cooler, before the installation of the waterfalls ends.
OK, enough stalling. I’ll take pictures of the big pile of fruit with birthday candles.
Finished audio book version of Slaughterhouse Five last night — it had an interview with Kurt Vonnegut at the end, along with this odd music mix with him reading from the book.
Aside from Tivo and EZPass all I’ve bought is….
Dunkin Donuts coffee and bagel Sat
I have a book and Heroes Season 2 in my shopping cart, but holding off checking out.
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Currently reading : Slaughterhouse-Five By Kurt Vonnegut Release date: 1999-01-12  |
Had a good time Friday night with the Bailey’s celebrating Jason’s birthday. He started poking around my ipod and set up a playlist and asked everyone to take turns adding songs. His dad made him a chess board so he set up the game for everyone to take turns playing. It was a good night.
Here’s what we came up with…. got through most of it until we switched to all Cat Stevens in honor of Jason’s dad after Jason opened the chess board.
When I get this one particular song in my head I just have to play it over and over and over and over. At least for an hour, and I could go all day, but I make myself stop. Instead of making me depressed it brings an sense of comfort, and at the same time this sense of strength — I feel better and a little energized when I hear it — appreciation of life I guess. I find it very strange.
I wish I could have been for you a more consistent friend
The chapters that I skipped I’m going to have to read againBut when I tear it down it only looks more ragged
And when I build it up it only looks more fake
But I can’t let it be because part of me died with you
And there’s lots of pages missing from my book
You had more to give than what I took.
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Currently listening : Thud By Kevin Gilbert Release date: 1995-03-21 |
Heather and I are on our way back from a day trip Charleston. Beautiful day. I think we walked 10 miles. We guessed at the temperature when we got back to the car — she gussed 93 and I guessed 91.
It was 81.
A couple friends thought of moving there a couple years ago. I’m so glad they stayed in NJ. Beautiful city though.
Michael Jackson has settled his Neverland Ranch issues for the moment, as I told you a couple of days ago.
So here’s the latest on his living arrangements. According to sources, Jackson is moving to upstate New York.
Specifically, I am told that Jackson has either bought a home or one has been purchased for him in or around Poughkeepsie, N.Y.
– From Robert Friedman, FoxNews
Current mood: drained
I”m still debating whether or not I’m going to this party Sat. It’s a big house party celebrating the end of the year with all Vassar folks — which will either be very fun and an opportunity for new friends, or a complete disaster with drunk professors bitching to me about their websites. But I think it’ll be the happier crowd.
Now, if my brother were in town it would be cool to make an appearance then go off and hang out together. I just sent him a note to see if he could come, or if not if I could go see him this weekend — looking at the calendar it’ll be until July before I’ll get another chance and that’s just entirely too long. My last visit with him — a year ago — also feels like one of the last “before my world fell apart” moments — not that dramatic, but you know what I mean. I need to bring him into the present. He wanted to visit last summer but I told him to stay away. Looking back on it I can’t believe I did that — I had forgotten actually.
Anyway, I am sooooooo looking forward to going to Charlotte for 2 weeks in June. Had dinner with the folks Sunday and my father asked if I had ever heard of the Penguin — he had seen it on “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives.” Yup.
Fried Pickles!
I may actually FINISH SOMETHING today — we’ve been working on a redesign of a site that has been a thorn in my side for 6 years. It’s been “almost done” since November. I *just* sent off the link to the folks who need to give the OK before we can launch this puppy and I can’t contain my excitement (fingers crossed that they don’t come back with 1000 things that need adjustment before we can finish.)
http://fllac.vassar.edu/
I think every email about this site for the past two weeks has the subject “soooooooo close.”
Of course, this is the kind of project I’d *like* to pop champagne for, but the meetings I have from 12-4pm will sweep that away as we move on to other things.
This site had to be done. The office spent so much effort on publicity for the art center — from meeting with publicity folks in NY to develop new press kits, to building relationships with the press, etc. But nothing was done about the website — it was an afterthought. We keep getting articles in the NYTimes, but the site for the art center is old and cranky, and not what you expect. The new site reflects what we want folks to see when they go to the site after hearing about a show on the radio or reading about it in the NYTimes.
There’s this idea around here of publicizing Poughkeepsie, mentioning shows and performances as a day-trip from the city. Well, if I live in NY and want to visit something upstate, and the website looks like our art center’s did, I wouldn’t go out of my way to check it out. And if I saw the site after reading a glowing write-up in the NYTimes I’d be disappointed (and wonder what the NYTimes doing covering this place.) Now we can back up the work others have been doing to publicize this place.
…surprising Garrett after work tomorrow
…launching work projects that are long overdue
…reunion dinner with MBA class Friday
…spending Saturday with Jen and Steve
…hopefully seeing my brother in May
…visiting Heather and Steve in June
…various events in between all that
Trying to pep-talk myself into getting shit done (and not guzzle more coffee) as I’m running out of day.
It’s really hard to come up with cake that isn’t cute. Cake is cute. Let the challenge begin….
I seem to be doing much better sanity-wise today. Work still insane, but things are falling in place. Right-hand guy at work is back from vacation, so that helps a lot.
Almost took a video of the cat this morning as he was going crazy as I was making coffee. He thinks the bag o’ coffee is his catnip. Then again, he may have just made that mistake once, but now knows that if his starts going insane while I’m making coffee I’ll inevitably going into the living room and give a dose of catnip. I don’t give this cat that much credit. Milos, yes. Chai is like living with curious George.
When I pulled in this morning Security was camped out in visitor’s parking. Helped remind me that I was going to start parking in legal spaces today. So, I did. Let’s see if I remember where I parked when I leave tonight.
I just had the weirdest sensation I think I’ve ever experienced. My head went numb – actually felt like I was stuffed with foam – then got cold, and that worked it’s way to my toes really slowly — kind of felt like foam that got filled up with water (cold water), then I felt this strange force, like energy work it’s way from my toes up to my head, just as slowly as the cold worked it’s way down. Then I almost got sick, and now I am extremely drained. Felt like slow-motion, but probably just under 5 mins.
It was due to a totally conscious decision to fuck with my own head. Whether it was a test, or just curiosity I’m not sure, but I decided to look at Monica’s purchase history in Amazon, which has everything she ordered beginning with her first order in 2000. There it was, every weekend I stopped by and she started off with “Look what I just got.”
Obviously not ready to go through that stuff yet, but I know I need to farm it out of Amazon before it gets lost. I was happy to see things I remembered her talking about – and stuff for Garrett for when he was older.
My memory lapses when under stress, so I’m a little obsessed with keeping track of things. I don’t usually forget entirely – I know there’s a story or a detail that exists but I just can’t get to it; kind of like I can see the index of a book, but when I get to pages they’re blank. I’m kind of stuck with just having an index at the moment.
I find my own brain frustrating. I have too many thoughts at once. I try to do too many things at once. I have every single song that was playing on the ride home last night in my head at this very moment.
Yet, I can’t pick a single thing to work on, or anything to listen to.
So, I continue to have a ridiculous headache because I have 42 songs fighting in my head.
I had so many thoughts floating in my head yesterday that when asked if I wanted coffee – a simple yes or no question that 99% of the time is yes – I honestly couldn’t compute, or decide. Realized I was thirsty, so I went for water. I then got distracted by realizing just how distracted I was.
While my head was racing I appeared as a person without a thought, and very quiet.
I know that’s OK, and my friends love and accept me for who I am, and I am free to be myself. I’m just not quite sure what to do when it’s me who is upset with myself for being quirky.
I blame it on the full moon. Truth is, I’m probably losing my grip on what’s left of my sanity. I need to lock myself in my apartment this weekend and clean, organize, and purge – I can’t hope to feel on solid ground until I get things in order there first.
Then I have to give up coffee. And start running again. Or at least ride my bike — no more parking tickets would be a good step in the right direction. Hey, even bringing my lunch. I actually started adding up how much a month I’d have if I stayed away from visitor’s parking, brought my lunch, and dropped coffee. I bit more than I realized.
Those of you who see me this weekend might end up seeing a basket full of these….coconut macaroons. Taste and look far better in person.
I can’t believe I blogged about cake.
Tip: when spending the day making cake, eat something that consists of a meal. Woke up shaky, and craving bacon.
Been thinking about switching my schedule to a 4-day week. Might pitch it as a trial for the summer. This way I could have Fridays off and avoid shore traffic by going to southern NJ Thursday night, have Friday night dinner, then have Sat. open for time with kids, then Sunday to myself.
Been debating what I’m doing next weekend. Either going to southern NJ, to Boston to see my brother, or taking the long weekend for myself. Not sure.
Current mood: enlightened
So, I splurged on a pair of Bose headphones. I think I made the right choice — I can hear Yo Yo Ma move and breathe as he plays.
Still at the office. Trying to pay attention to code. Almost done.
Writing a new calendar. Detail work.
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Currently listening : Bach: The Cello Suites Inspired By Bach, From The Six-Part Film Series / Yo-Yo Ma By Yo-Yo Ma Release date: 17 February, 1998  |
I’m having a hard time believing the price of dragees — those little silver or gold sugar balls you can stick on cookies. A jar, 2.2oz is $12.95 yet 2.2lb is $34.95. Um, huh? Grr. I can picture 2 pounds of dragees spilling onto the kitchen floor.
The only place I haven’t tried is the Culinary store. I don’t think I can trust myself to check out the CIA’s store, at least not alone. And now I can’t remember what I needed them for. Rivets on wheels were one thing, but that’s this summer. Something for Easter? Who knows.
Next cake: Dad’s birthday. Carrot cake, white frosting, 70 shamrocks (not sure of what — marshmallow? cookies? not sure.). His 70th birthday is on St. Patrick’s day. I’ve narrowed down the cake part to two recipes. Looks like work will get subjected to cupcakes again as I decide.
My mother tried to tell me my father wasn’t even Irish. Big debate on the proportions of my ancestry. We got it straightened out. Not that the Irish thing mattered (OK, maybe a little) but it would have just been one more thing I found out after so many years that was completely off the mark. And frankly, my father putting up with the shamrocks on his birthday/St. Patty’s day for all these years and not saying a word would be really out of character.
Anyway, I don’t even like cake. Never understood my obsession with making these things. My theory is I used to love decorating cookies with piping. Worked with a caterer for a bit around the time a doctor told me I should never take up tennis or anything requiring grip — like piping. So I gave it up. A few years ago I started working with fondant, which is more like clay, and is much easier on my cranky hands.
I could tell I was in the land of obsession when, after not finding a 1″ shamrock cookie-cutter, I looked up instructions to make my own. That, and I actually had all the materials to make one — like a sheet of copper, etc….
Ha! I just remembered — I needed gold dragees for a little pot of gold. Might drop it.
My parents threw a party last night for Californians at Vassar – a “Break the Winter Blues” party to introduce folks with a California connection to each other. It was inspired by a new faculty member who was having a hard time adjusting to her first gig in the east. Everyone seemed to have a great time, and it may turn into an annual event.
I was a little concerned being the only non-Californian in the house. A few other “adopted Californians” were supposed to attend, but couldn’t make it at the last minute – leaving me to fend for myself. I got a bit nervous when I was cornered on three separate occasions by important faculty at the college who voiced concern about job-related crankiness, but I managed to calm concerns (I hope) and turn the conversation back to their California connections.
The highlight of the evening for me, making it a very special night, was talking with my father. We rarely talk about anything but current events and non-personal topics. We started small-talking about music – I expected, as usual, that he would walk away, but instead we got talking about The Beatles. Turns out he’s a fan. He went on to talk about their performances in Hamburg, and how he in Germany at that time while he was in the Army (a time of his life he has only mentioned, and briefly, in the last few years.) I pulled out the iPod and put on a few tracks. He told me how he had followed their career, intrigued by how their popularity in England was sparked after performing in Germany, and not the other way around (something I’m going to look up.) He mentioned a documentary coming out he’s excited to get. I had no idea.
That was it. The rest of the night was small-talk only, but that moment was very cool. A door opened.
I’ve been worried about him. He seems to be acting, as I imagine I will when I get to the winter of my life, to be cataloguing his papers and memories. He’s been digitizing photos and slides from years ago, and sorting through things in general. I can’t shake the gut feeling that he’s preparing for something — that he doesn’t think he has much more time. He had a stroke two years ago. He is doing well now, and turns 70 next month. That’s enough for anyone to get some things in order, but he’s doing it in an extreme way – a massive undertaking.
For years I’ve been resigned to the fact that I will get to know him only through the diaries he leaves behind. When I moved back to the area, almost ten years ago, I hoped that would give us the opportunity to get to know each other, but his private tendencies have continued to shut me out. I have accepted that. I know I tried –I didn’t go with my gut and cut him off, run away. I do admit that my time in Montana was an intentional move to run away. But as some of you know, that backfired, for the best. I found out his family had settled in Montana so I did some research on the family while I was there. That helped spark a couple of short conversations. I’m trying to gather some things together and try all that again now that he may be more receptive. I think the thing that keeps me trying is that I’m just as stubborn as he is – and I know I got it from him.
We continue to surprise each other. It’s been difficult, but last night I felt like I got to know him a little better.
Well, today marks the anniversary of when I moved from Concord, MA to Hyde Park, NY. So that means — Chantelle and Heather — that on Feb. 4 our friendship will have reached legal drinking age….
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